Cards & Coconuts

It started with a rousing game of Wizard (no, this is not a new version of Dungeons and Dragons. This is actually a card game, albeit one that requires no skill whatsoever), it carried through deep conversations about electro hair removal, and it culminated in an impromtu guitar jam session. No, this was not a really pathetic high school party (or, if you're a really pathetic person, a completely kick-ass high school party). This was actually an evening at work. I'm sitting here at 3 in the morning with my friends and co-workers Shane, Kelly & Leigh. I'm sleep deprived, a little under the weather, and a bit disappointed after learning that another of my co-workers has apparently bumped ahead of me in the all important "Who We Like Better" list on my adopted platoon. Nevertheless, this is a place of business, and we can't allow such minor issues to affect our job. I mean, there are important things to be done tonight, as we have now moved into the Open Mic portion of the jam. Right about now, some of you doubters in the crowd are labeling me a liar. A damn hot liar. Alas, I am telling the truth. This is what is unfolding around me at work. A musical sidenote to the cards and conversations that have taken place throughout the shift. Before you get all uptight, thinking that my work is nothing but fun and games, let me set some things straight. Work environments, for most, are zones of constant learning. Here it is no different. For example, tonight we learned that women don't have to remove their panties to get a Brazilian wax, and that most respectable aestheticians refuse to do a male Brazilian, or what I have dubbed "The Amazon" (clear cut the rainforest, leaving nothing but the trunk and the coconuts). I guarantee that you don't get this kind of on the job education as, say, a male nurse. By the way, before I go, I want to convey my deepest apologies to the male nursing community. I have mocked them in the past and present (and most likely the future), but recently found that they are not an anomaly on the medical world, but instead a growing population. I vow to take these professional pioneers more seriously in the future.
For more information on this noble and completely respectable profession, please check out the Male Nurse Magazine website at:

*link removed by request*


Okay, I couldn't keep a straight face typing that last bit. And yes, that is a real magazine.